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VOLUME 6: THE TRIANGLE OF SAFETY Today, we are sharing an essay from Danielle on the importance of the Trian= gle of Safety: what it is, what it means for you, and how it can help you b= ecome a more balanced and resilient self. Triangle of Safety When we know that something is "off" but lack the means = to resolve it, we feel a sort of dread in our bodies. The kind of tension t= hat keeps you chugging coffee all day, desperate and apathetic all at once.= If that sounds relatable, this writing is for you. Consider it a tool to o= rient you back to nervous system safety, deep satisfaction, and fulfillment= . Many people can tell you they're unsatisfied, or that their needs aren't = being met. But very few can tell you what those needs actually are, let alo= ne what they desire out of life. In a culture that expects us to "grind" an= d "hustle" without regard for our well-being, this is the norm. Today, I in= vite you to step away from that and take an honest inventory of what would = genuinely improve your quality of life. Not in theory, but in real, practic= al ways you can move forward with today. According to Dr. Lee Cordell of Th= e Institute for Trauma and Psychological Safety, we have three core needs t= o feel truly safe in our bodies. At SDS, we call this the Triangle of Safet= y, and it's the foundation of the entire summit. Here are those core needs,= and what it looks like to meet them: 1) Physical Safety 2) Psychological S= afety 3) Agency (the ability to choose) If one of these is missing we exper= ience low grade chronic stress. If more than one is missing then we go into= full on survival mode. So how do we meet these needs? Meeting our Physical= Safety needs means: We feel no threat (real or perceived) of physical harm= , we have enough money to pay our bills and nourish ourselves, and our phys= ical bodies are healthy and support our way of life. Meeting our Psychologi= cal Safety needs means: We have the freedom to express ourselves without fe= ar of rejection, the ability to voice our needs and "negative" emotions wit= hout fear of retaliation, and a general sense of acceptance in our social g= roups and workplaces. Also, we like ourselves. Our internal self-talk is ki= nd. Meeting our Agency needs means: We feel empowered to make choices for o= urselves, even when they don't match the norm. We feel capable and resource= d, and able to solve our own problems without outsourcing our power to some= one outside ourselves (which is different from collaborating). If one of th= ese is missing, we experience low-grade chronic stress. If more than one is= missing, we go into full survival mode. Nervous system safety is a game of= balance where self-awareness, compassion, and curiosity meet. It's not som= ething you accomplish once and master for life=E2=80=94 rather, it's the em= bodiment of self-esteem and an identity of health, and every single person'= s path looks different. Learning about your unique needs is one of the most= loving choices you can make for yourself and the people in your life. If y= ou've made it this far, I want to celebrate your courage and dedication to = improving your own life. Bravo! That makes you part of the exceptional mino= rity. This work is not linear and not always easy, but I can attest that it= is absolutely worthwhile. Good luck on your journey, Seeker! We go deeper = on all of this in my workshop at The Summit. You are warmly invited, and I = look forward to seeing you there. With love, Danielle =E2=80=9CI can do not= hing for you but work on myself. You can do nothing for me but work on your= self=E2=80=9D -Ram Dass We look forward to your future submissions to Dear Danielle, and can't wait= to see you at the Slowdown Summit on April 27. Get your ticket today! Rest= up. Slow down. Lead differently. =F0=9F=8C=B1 Click on the link below to open the message in a browser: https://slowdownsummit.co/so/d1PpOBQdR/c?w=3D6NlxMe5qypl0Z3etcJKAqiPBHthF75= vTKaG2I83MXNg.eyJ1IjoiaHR0cHM6Ly9zbG93ZG93bnN1bW1pdC5jby9zby9kMVBwT0JRZFI_b= GFuZ3VhZ2VUYWc9ZW4iLCJtIjoibWFpbCIsImMiOiJiYzM0Yjk3MC1lZTdlLTQ1NjYtODQ0OC1j= NjRlNjBlYWQ0OTQifQ You've received this email because you are a subscriber of this site. https://slowdownsummit.co/so/d1PpOBQdR/c?w=3DPf9vCX4cqzAPuTQXGZODmVn7M5xIsF= kdvM0oNHP5TCY.eyJ1IjoiaHR0cHM6Ly93d3cuc2xvd2Rvd25zdW1taXQuY28vIiwibSI6Im1ha= WwiLCJjIjoiYmMzNGI5NzAtZWU3ZS00NTY2LTg0NDgtYzY0ZTYwZWFkNDk0In0 If you feel you received it by mistake or wish to unsubscribe, please click= here. https://www.slowdownsummit.co//_manage-consent/api/revoke-consent/unsubscri= be?wixToken=3DJWE.eyJhbGciOiJBMTI4S1ciLCJlbmMiOiJBMTI4Q0JDLUhTMjU2Iiwia2lkI= joiZkhJbFA4M1cifQ.8zFNkYWIUMCygJIiqud6m8-yojN8WWC_Sdg83lW-mkUSh9MRoXyLsQ.5X= KJIBRFmDIQNh_vE4YicA.Ro-_a0Bv7MWigV5XTTqvf1dC0weqpgsgBVeaV0Yr78S7dJt_RPPkfP= EtzH6yY-e5iRfb4MP66hrBj9c95L2reU0XpGtZ2pkALmru1EqLL-6XJ-8ULdbt5cGv-prVv2fjV= XNPBXRfK4TzY9849wNyVnSAwna2Vf6LAVcYg4BZXgJ1a9zkcT6dVUguXjdW6lU-z2Fk4ikRSDcp= h7vsROXjwp068-CvUKdCDKKPIpcjr5HawPvfnzSHmeJwhM4biY2R9i_ME7xSEoWkuAZ2CBSScL5= zcMi4oe5fphco9U46I4Ip638Zrle1rGHLPoGW2FjrimW24zPa4FZ4GfyGcDypmBAP3btVL9P3lg= tfFLCbEgr9NxkkkWlNqrUSmDnZJjgU-QuD7HIWyJD5IM5Wqy9ZPQ0BozqMLnkNsKBak90Dv94wW= a9TEKXGcolTGRA3Gp7h.t2S5VmoloBbJO7F__kz9LA&locale=3Den --425c9da6b97feff77bccbaae45f6a15cbe4d1b999c46efa1df9ac3da7b58 Content-Transfer-Encoding: quoted-printable Content-Type: text/html; charset=utf-8 Mime-Version: 1.0 @media only screen and (min-width:480px){ .a {width:10= 0%!important;max-width:100%;}.b {width:35.3596757852077%!important;max-widt= h:35.3596757852077%;}.c {width:29.280648429584605%!important;max-width:29.2= 80648429584605%;} }
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3D"Introducing

VOLUME 6: THE TRIANGLE OF SAFETY

<= /tr>
=
<= table align=3D"center" border=3D"0" cellpadding=3D"0" cellspacing=3D"0" rol= e=3D"presentation" style=3D"background:#FFFFFF;background-color:#FFFFFF;wid= th:100%">
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<= p style=3D"margin:0;text-align:left;line-height:24px;font-size:16px;" class= =3D"qb sb">Triangle of Safety

 

When we know that something is "of= f" but lack the means to resolve it, we feel a sort of dread in our bodies.= The kind of tension that keeps you chugging coffee all day, desperate and = apathetic all at once. If that sounds relatable, this writing is for you. C= onsider it a tool to orient you back to nervous system safety, deep satisfa= ction, and fulfillment.

 

Many people can tell you they're unsatisfied, or tha= t their needs aren't being met. But very few can tell you what those needs = actually are, let alone what they desire out of life. In a culture that exp= ects us to "grind" and "hustle" without regard for our well-being, this is = the norm.

 

Today, I invite you to step away from that and take an honest in= ventory of what would genuinely improve your quality of life. Not in theory= , but in real, practical ways you can move forward with today.

 

According to= Dr. Lee Cordell of The Institute for Trauma and Psychological Safety, we h= ave three core needs to feel truly safe in our bodies. At SDS, we call this= the Triangle of Safety, and it's the foundation of the entire summit.

 

Here are those core needs, and what it looks like to meet them:

 

1) Physical Safety

2) P= sychological Safety

3) Agenc= y (the ability to choose)

 

If one of these is = missing we experience low grade chronic stress. If more than one is missing= then we go into full on survival mode. So how do we meet these needs? = ;

 = ;

Meeting our Physical Safet= y needs means:

We feel no threat (real or per= ceived) of physical harm, we have enough money to pay our bills and nourish= ourselves, and our physical bodies are healthy and support our way of life= . 

 

Meeting our Psycholo= gical Safety needs means: 

We have the freedom to express = ourselves without fear of rejection, the ability to voice our needs and "ne= gative" emotions without fear of retaliation, and a general sense of accept= ance in our social groups and workplaces. Also, we like ourselves. Our inte= rnal self-talk is kind.

 

Meet= ing our Agency needs means:

We feel empowered to make choices for oursel= ves, even when they don't match the norm. We feel capable and resourced, an= d able to solve our own problems without outsourcing our power to someone o= utside ourselves (which i= s different from collaborating).

 

If one of these is missing, we experience = low-grade chronic stress. If more than one is missing, we go into full surv= ival mode.

 

Ner= vous system safety is a game of balance where self-awareness, compassion, a= nd curiosity meet. It's not something you accomplish once and master for li= fe=E2=80=94 rather, it's the embodiment of self-esteem and an identity of h= ealth, and every single person's path looks different. Learning about your = unique needs is one of the most loving choices you can make for yourself an= d the people in your life.

 

If you've made it this far, I want to celebrate your courage a= nd dedication to improving your own life. Bravo! That makes you part of the= exceptional minority. This work is not linear and not always easy, but I c= an attest that it is absolutely worthwhile.

 

Good luck on your journey, Seeke= r! We go deeper on all of this in my workshop at The Summit. You are warmly= invited, and I look forward to seeing you there.

 

With lo= ve, 

Danielle 

 

=E2=80=9CI can do nothing for you but= work on myself.  You can do nothing for me but work on yourself=E2=80= =9D -Ram Dass = ;

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